The holidays are often seen as the most joyful time of the year. Festive lights, cozy gatherings, and shared meals with loved ones fill our days with warmth and connection. But let’s be real: they can also be complicated. For many of us, the season stirs up unresolved tensions, old wounds, and moments where family dynamics or friendships feel strained. That’s why forgiveness is such an important gift—not just to others but to yourself.

Why Forgiveness Matters

Holding onto anger or resentment can feel justified, especially if someone has deeply hurt you. But here’s the hard truth: carrying that weight often does more harm to you than to the person who wronged you. It’s like drinking poison and expecting the other person to feel sick. Forgiveness is less about excusing bad behavior and more about freeing yourself from the heavy burden of negativity.

Studies have shown that practicing forgiveness can lead to reduced stress, better mental health, and even improved physical well-being. It’s a way of saying, “I’m choosing peace over pain.” And isn’t that what we all deserve during the holidays?

The Danger of Assumptions

Sometimes our anger or disappointment doesn’t even come from what someone did but from what we assume about their intentions. Maybe a friend didn’t return your call, or a family member forgot something important to you. It’s easy to jump to conclusions like, “They don’t care about me” or “They’re selfish.” But what if there’s more to the story?

The truth is, everyone is fighting battles we may not see. Your friend might be overwhelmed with work. Your family member might be struggling emotionally. When you pause to consider these possibilities, it creates space for understanding and compassion—the foundation of forgiveness.

How to Practice Forgiveness

Forgiveness doesn’t happen overnight, and it doesn’t mean you have to forget or condone hurtful behavior. But it’s a process that can bring you closer to healing. Here are some steps to help you along the way:

1. Acknowledge Your Feelings: Start by being honest with yourself about how you feel. Anger, sadness, and disappointment are valid emotions. Recognizing them is the first step to moving forward.
2. Consider Their Perspective: Try to imagine what might have led the other person to act the way they did. This doesn’t excuse their behavior, but it can help you see the situation with more empathy.
3. Communicate (If You’re Ready): If it feels safe and appropriate, have an open conversation with the person. Express how their actions affected you, but also be willing to listen.
4. Let Go of Expectations: Forgiveness isn’t about getting an apology or changing someone’s behavior. It’s about releasing yourself from the grip of anger and resentment.
5. Forgive Yourself: Sometimes the hardest person to forgive is ourselves. If you’re holding onto guilt or shame, remind yourself that you’re human and deserving of the same compassion you extend to others.

Reconnecting Through Forgiveness

The beautiful thing about forgiveness is that it can pave the way for reconnection. Many relationships falter not because of what happened but because no one is willing to take the first step toward healing. Extending an olive branch—even if it’s just in your heart—can open the door to repaired relationships and deeper understanding.

Of course, forgiveness doesn’t mean you have to rekindle every relationship. Sometimes setting boundaries is the healthiest choice. But even then, forgiving can help you let go of bitterness and move forward with peace.

A Holiday Challenge

This holiday season, I challenge you to reflect on forgiveness. Is there someone in your life—a friend, a family member, or even yourself—that you’ve been struggling to forgive? Take a moment to acknowledge those feelings and consider what letting go might look like for you.

Forgiveness isn’t always easy, but it’s one of the most powerful gifts you can give. And the best part? It doesn’t cost a thing. So, unwrap the gift of peace this holiday season—you deserve it.

What Does the Bible Say About Forgiveness?

The Bible provides profound insights into the importance of forgiveness. Here are a few scriptures to reflect on as you embrace forgiveness this holiday season:

• Ephesians 4:32: “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
• Colossians 3:13: “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”
• Matthew 6:14-15: “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”
• Luke 6:37: “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.”
• Mark 11:25: “And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”

What are your thoughts on forgiveness? I’d love to hear your experiences and insights in the comments below. Let’s create a space of kindness and understanding this holiday season.